Thursday, June 18, 2009


Some things gain clarity with a change of  perception or perspective.

Earlier this week I walked through the door of a building  to pay a learned man to cut off part of my nose. A really tiny part, but it did require  some needle work, some blades and a  most unattractive bandage perched on the very tip.  I am not black and blue, no stitches required, 
I don't hurt unless I forget myself and bump my nose while donning glasses. The "site" has to be kept moist with vaseline, and covered to protect from sunlight.   This is an inconvenience, not a tragedy.

When I showed up back home with the Bozo bandage, Blowfish was taken aback,

"Fishy, what is that"?

" A bandage"

" What's under than bandage"?

" My nose". 

But I did go on to explain the happenings of the day.

" You had nose surgery without telling me"?

I explained to Blowfish I had been to the "primary" doc last week and asked about a change in a "freckle" and  the surrounding tissues. The primary took a look and declared there was "nothing" to be concerned about.  He rather sternly reminded me he had so adjudicated on my previous visit.  I declared how I understood these sorts of changes ought to be investigated , and that additional changes had occurred since our last exam. So the primary said he'd get his "girl" to schedule a visit to a specialist if,
"I wanted to waste my money and the insurance companies. " 

So I went feeling a bit foolish  and wasteful.

I departed feeling less foolish, less wasteful but feeling strange about the Bozo bandage.

I had to stop at the drug store to buy the things for "wound care" as advised. 
This was my first experience with going public with the bandage front and center. The girl stocking the aisles stopped immediately to help me locate the necessary products. Cheerful and helpful and not staring too much.

After the pharmacy, I stopped at the Shell station to top off the tank. While  engaged in this activity a man drove up adjacent to my position, got out, gave me a nod, stopped and stared a bit then got back in his car and drove away.


 This was the beginning of the reactions, split pretty evenly between the gracious and the not so gracious. I find it funny, not hurtful or  awkward.  Some have said, " Oh, I hardly noticed", which is quite impossible. Others have said, " I wouldn't leave my house if I looked like that"

Back to Blowfish, who asked,

 " What does it look like under that bandage"?

" I have no idea".

"When will you know"

" When I replace the bandage in the morning".

" Say Fishy, you might want to make it, well, a smaller bandage".


So the next morning I had a private unveiling. Some swelling and redness, maybe even purpleness and right in the middle  it looks like someone stubbed out a cigarette on the tip of my nose. NOT a pretty site. No chance whatsoever that I would be going forth without covering up that unsettling vision.  That was BEFORE I discovered the challenges of getting a smaller bandage to  stay put on vaselined flesh of an odd shape. Quite the frustrating experience until I figured  out, with a bit of modifying,  I could use  bandaids made for staying put on fingers. 

This is not attractive but it is a bit less Bozo. Also, the bandaids are "flesh" toned  and more or less follow the contours of  my nose which has led to a new set of responses. That is because at first folks don't notice and when they do it is comical to watch them struggle with their response. To speak? To not speak? To converse with my face or my shoes?  

One of my clients stopped in Tuesday and laughed out loud. She offered to fetch a sharpie  and write "nose surgery" on the bandage so people wouldn't think I was on the losing side of an unfriendly altercation. I passed on her offer.

 Another client came in with her  just getting into the  self absorption stage of early teen years who looked at the attraction in the middle of my face and said, " OMG! OMG! I would die before I would go out in public  like that!". After which she escaped to wait in the car before her mother recovered from the shock of her daughters behavior. I laughed and told the Mom, there was not enough  lucre on the planet  to bribe me into being that age again.

Thing is, I am traveling this weekend for Father's Day.
 I will still be bandaged . 
So I will get the full experience of  " the public" and "the family"  responses.
Wonder how many of those folks will think I should have just stayed home?



moi said...

Fishy, dear, just tell everyone this story as charmingly as you told us and everything will be fine. And make sure you're wearing a great pair of shoes, in case someone can't help but keep their eyes there.

BTW, you ARE okay, right?

Jenny said...

I was going to suggest a really big pair of earrings so people wouldn't be looking at your nose. :-)

And to second Moi, it's OK? I had a "Mole Check" done last year and they found one they wanted to remove (I think they feel they should do something) It was on my stomach, and I agree it's not an easy thing to manage in the first days. But at least mine was hidden.

and I'll also say to anyone else reading this..... mole checks are important and potentially life saving. Done by your Dermatologist.

NYD said...

It is merely a temporary situation and you obviously hae a sense of humour about it.

This too shall pass.

If ever the occasion to repeat this again arises try to time it to Halloween. You'll get better mileage outta it.

sparringK9 said...

you might get lucky with that bandage. if it means fellow travelers give you a wide berth then rock the heck on. you might even score and extra seat. i remember when my step mom had a bunch of skin cancers burned off. looked just like what you said - somebody stubbed out cigarettes on her leaving a purple crater. maybe you should stop by the clown store and get a REAL red rubber nose. grherahahaha
safe travels.

LaDivaCucina said...

The bandage on the face/nose is pretty common in Australia where melanoma and other skin cancers are prevalent. So, either move to Sydney or ignore the stares and comments, swallow your vanity and rest assured that you've caught it in time! Good luck!

Aunty Belle said...

Got some Dora or Barney bandages-- I mean, make 'em WORK at keepin' a straight face!

Heh heh.

fishy said...

how did I miss this opportunity to splurge on new shoes!!!!! Awesome idea for an indulgent distraction.
And yes Moi, I am just fine, thanks for asking.

More good advice, I think the jewelry department is adjacent to the shoes! Good advice on the checks, many a person has been spared the misery of a major issue by taking care of the minor issues.

Howling at your Halloween suggestion. Combined with K9's to maybe get a real Bozo nose ... with maybe flashy shoes and big earrings....

Usually I get seated next to the 400 pound unbathed man whose flesh
cannot be confined in just one seat so overlaps onto me. If this works to my advantage, I will bandage my nose for all air travel!

one day I hope to visit Australia ... I definitely will invest in sunblock for the trip,
maybe even a nose guard if it isn't too Hannibal Lector looking.

Aunty Belle,
H-O-W-L ... what another great suggestion. You have given me an idea. I think I will marker a fishy on the bandage ... so much more "me" than Dora or Barney. Or maybe I will draw another green eye for better "vision".

Thanks all for the good cheer!

h said...

A very successful bank robber used a fake scar on his nose as his only "disquise". Witnesses couldn't get his height, build, hair-color, eye-color, complexion, or anything else right. Just "he had stitches on his nose".

Just saying...

fishy said...

Errrrrrrr Troll,
Are you saying I should maximize this opporytunity to rob a bank?

Kymical Reactions said...

Good Grief Fishy! I don't see why a band-aid on the end of your nose is any different than having one on your elbow. You have a samll wound that needs covered, and I don't see why people make a deal of it when it's on a persons face. Speedy recovery to you. Have a good holiday weekend.

sparringK9 said...

"i am not an animal!" grrherhahaha

Aunty Belle said...

Post photo of nose under MM theme fer this week:VISION

Pam said...

Best of luck on that nose and hope it is/was nothing serious! Too funny about the absorbed teenager. I was going to suggest enhancing the cleavage to have people's eyes go elsewhere!!!

Aunty Belle said...

Oh Fishy, thar's a hell of a splash over in yore state. I'se thinkin' ya would have somethin' ter say 'bout all that.. nuthin' posted so, I took the liberty of jawin' on it on the Front Porch.