Home Truths

" Ummm, Fishy are you alright?"
"Sure"
" Did you want to go out to dinner?"
"Not really"

Blowfish looked around . There were no pots simmering on the stove, no red lights indicating the oven was doing it's thing, no favorite smells wafting out to the garden room.  This is a reality he always finds disconcerting. Blowfish is one of those men who just plain loves to come home to a fine smelling Kitchen.  He even rubs his hands together like a cartoon character or takes us through a few dance steps around the Kitchen to express his joy.  The man loves his groceries. If there was any justice in the world of metabolism I would be a wraith and he would be rotund.  When we first married Blowfish would get up and before the second foot hit the floor he would be asking what's for dinner. I have no idea at 6am what I might be hungry for at 7pm. I would much rather keep a stocked pantry and decide what to cook  based on what I am hankering for. Blowfish much prefers knowing because he wants to anticipate dinner all through his day. Ever the optimist, it took him two full decades to accept this reality of life with Fishy was unlikely to change.  To his credit he has learned to anticipate surprises.

No food smells and no dinner date are not a "surprise" he enjoys.  On this day he looked around, gave a little nod and headed down the hall to get changed. He was back promptly.
" Fishy, did something happen today?"
"No"
"Are you upset about something?"
"Uh-uh"
"Mad about something? Mad at me?"
" Why are you asking?"
" That rainbow in my closet might have something to do with it."
" Oh. That. Just ignore it."
I may have mentioned in a previous post that I do laundry and organize closets when I am agitated about things I cannot change. I had on this day done all of Blowfish's laundry and,  had then organized his section of polo shirts in the cool to warm color range of a rainbow. This, combined with the no food smells was making his alarms chime.
"Fishy, lets go up to Joe's and have us a fine dinner, some good wine and some foot rubbing under the table."
I laughed out loud.
" Odessa is right about you.  You are a fool of a man".
" Only about what I love. Is it a date?"
"No"
Did I mention Blowfish is an optimist?
" Well we can do all the wine drinking and foot rubbing we want at home. Add a little peanut butter and jelly and I can rest happy."
This was even said with a smile.
Still laughing I said, " Why don't you get changed and I will magically make your dinner appear."

When he came back to the Kitchen there was nothing happening. He looked crestfallen.  Truly.
Then he noticed a table setting , a wine glass, a corkscrew. He looked a little better. Even hopeful.
He smiled as her turned toward the Kitchen and said,
" It's seafood pasta salad isn't it?"

As he was finishing his vat of  dinner he said,
" Fishy. What is up with all this?  My laundry is done, my closets are organized, my dinner is awesome."
I said,
" Well, its sort of a good bye, remember me fondly statement".
Looking confused he stood  up to ask, " you're leaving?"
" Possibly. You see I got so  furious with the games coming out of Washington  today I lost control. I dispatched  e-mails to every member of Congress and to the President telling them if it was up to me they would be terminated immediately. Later it dawned on me the word 'terminated' could be interpreted to mean something other than 'You're fired!'.  I expect the FBI to show up just any minute and haul me away for being a threat to our democracy."

Blowfish winced,
" Damn girl, you never have looked your best in stripes."